Going East

Tomorrow morning I will get on a plane and fly to N.H. to visit some family members. Will see my oldest son, his wife and my little grandson. He and I will be able to play piano together, hopefully. He is much better at it than I am, but he has a head start of a few years of lessons. I just started mine in January. Then I'll stay with my mom, who is 94 years old. Hoping to take her to lunch and breakfast during my stay...and will also get to spend some time with my sistah, Robin! I will also go visit my good friend, Judy, who I try to see each time I visit the area, but sometimes I just don't have the time.

I just got an email from my daughter-in-law about an impending snow storm heading right for them. Sigh. It's supposed to hit tomorrow night, which is when I land in Manchester. Hoping it fades out and doesn't hit as badly as they are saying it will. Spring is not the time of year I'd like to experience snow in New England!

Ashes to Ashes...

I want my burial to be natural, or green, or whatever one calls being simply laid to rest "organically". The natural burial is becoming more popular across the country, but still has a long way to go. I think my husband believes I am joking when I talk about this, not because he can't face the prospect of my death (although we both have agreed that he should probably go first, because he would have more trouble adjusting to life alone) but because he can't imagine why I should care about what happens to my earthly body once my soul has left it.

But, I am serious. I know this because I keep returning to the prospect of a simple, natural burial and find that it feels comfortable. It is not an idea that I have pondered and forgotten about. Nor have I made this statement on a whim because it sounds like the right thing to do. I have done online research and read a book or two about the subject, as well as a book or two about traditional "modern" funeral procedures and burials. The inside scoop isn't pretty, folks.

When a loved one dies, the family is usually so overcome with grief and sadness that they immediately put matters into the hands of the local funeral director and he/she does it all. The bereaved only need go pick out a casket, make appropriate (and hopefully affordable) arrangements, and then show up at the appointed times and places, even going so far as to be chauffeured to and fro. There is nothing wrong with all of that; it is "how it is done". Consider this...many years ago, before some guy realized how lucrative this could be...people took care of their own dearly departed. They often washed the body, dressed it, said good-bye as they lovingly cared for this special family member. They even had the viewing in their living rooms! Bring that coffin in, fellas, and we will set things up right here. No need to schlep down to the funeral home where everyone feels uncomfortable and out of place. Gather 'round everyone, take a look, say a prayer, have some coffee and set a spell. Then, not long after, everyone would either walk or drive to the local cemetery (sometimes family owned, but also could be church owned) to have the funeral and lay this loved person to rest. The coffin was often hand made in a simple design, no frills, no puffy pink interior to keep the loved one "comfy" in their final resting place.

Let's face it, modern funerals are for the living...the left behind...to gracefully help them adjust to losing someone they love. Makes it easier to take if everything is done "just right" and we can see for ourselves just how wonderful the process can be. And, I just can't help but think the funeral industry uses a time of vulnerability and distraction to convince the mourners that their loved one would look wonderful in THAT coffin, and having two days of viewings would give EVERYONE a chance to come say good-bye, and yes you will be very glad that you chose the limo to drive you around during this stressful time.

I digress...

Granted, embalming serves a purpose in that it does allow extra time for relatives to fly into town and attend the funeral. But the whole idea of using all that poison for this purpose really bugs me. Because you know that eventually that body is going to disintegrate, and all those chemicals (mostly formaldehyde) are eventually going to leak into the ground soil, because no matter how sturdy that casket is, and how thick that cement grave liner is, things will begin to break down and poison everything around the area.

Beyond all that, just imagining my funeral being a simple event, with my body wrapped in a shroud and placed into a grave that is in a beautiful field or forest appeals to me. Knowing that I will eventually be fertilizer for this beautiful earth that God created feels so much better than the other, more popular, option. Many family members may not be able to attend my funeral, since time will be of the essence (no embalming!) and there may not be time (well, there's always dry ice, which aids in preservation for a little longer time), and I can empathize with that. But, since how and where I am laid to rest is my last decision, I do believe those who love me will understand and perhaps some day go visit the place where I rest and enjoy the beauty that I am now a part of.

More on this later. In the meantime, here are some links if you want to learn more:

http://www.greenburials.org/

http://greencemetery.blogspot.com/

http://www.beatree.com/

You can also Google "green burials" or "natural burials" and you will come up with plenty of info.

Insurance Sales People

I'm just gonna say that they annoy me. My advice is to never go looking for quotes or info...because they will haunt you relentlessly until you either buy something or tell them unequivocally that you won't buy something. My hubby has been looking for quotes from various companies, just to see about changing our life insurance, etc. This one guy in particular has been driving me crazy. Calling about every other day, as well as sending an email right after he calls. This has been going on for weeks, even though he was told no decisions will be made for at least another month. If then. I'm gonna answer his next call and tell him to PLEEEEZE stop calling and just sit tight until WE contact him.

There...got that off my chest.

What to do

Here I sit with my cup of green & white tea, and a Vita-Muffin top (corn) while dealing with aching hips and wondering why I am so not athletically inclined. Apparently, while playing softball (which I never do) with friends on Saturday, I strained or tore or otherwise injured some tendons or muscles that I never use. I never thought I'd actually hit the ball, so didn't think twice about have to sprint from base to base. I hit the ball, twice. Well, actually 3 times, but by the third time up at bat I knew I couldn't run the bases, so had a designated runner (is there such a thing?). My hips and upper thighs are very sore and painful...which had begun to fade away but yesterday I found it necessary to gently jog into Target as I was in a hurry, but that was the wrong thing to do. By the time I finished my business in there and headed toward my car, I knew I was back in pain city. Barely able to lift my legs getting into the car, and have continued to have pain when moving certain ways...as well as an overall ache in the hip area...makes me wonder why. I walk regularly on the treadmill, including uphill with little jogs and walking backwards, and I do yoga several times a week, yet I seem to not be in any better shape than I was in my pre-exercise state. Sigh. Perhaps it is age. Still. It makes me feel like an invalid who can't move at all without having consequences.

No wonder people give up on being physically fit. I come from a long line of wet noodles...I'd like to change that trend but it isn't looking promising.

Hump Day

Yep, it's Wednesday. For the unofficially retired, it is often just another day...but, since I do participate in various activities then it is Wednesday to me. Today is the day of each week that I tutor a little 2nd grader in reading. When I began tutoring, I wasn't so sure it was something I could do, but as time has passed I've found I am really enjoying it, and I do believe it is helping the student to read better. I LOVE to read, so figured it was something I should do...help a young mind understand words more so someday he will also love to read.

Perhaps at some point I'll post a book review now and then. I just read a novel titled "Still Alice". What a great book, although when I began reading it I wasn't so sure it was going to be great. The story is about an about-to-turn 50 woman who is diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. The author is a Ph.D. in neurology at Harvard U, and knows what she is writing about. The story drew me in, and before I knew it I was trying to read it all the time...sad, funny, interesting and scary. I learned quite a bit about the symptoms and progression of Alzheimer's, as well as what a likely frame of mind a patient might have. Whew. I cried, laughed and got really angry at the woman's husband, who seemed selfish. Although, to be fair he was struggling with watching his wife spiral down into the horrible state of being an Alzheimer's sufferer. And he did end up being more understanding and providing a good life for her. Hmmmm, I guess I just wrote a book review...a short one! :)

On that note...I am now taking piano lessons!! And I love it...so cool to be making music. My "Nana" played and I would watch and listen to her when I was a child. My grandson has been taking lessons for several years, so seeing and hearing him kind of got me interested again. Maybe some day I will play really well!

Speaking of piano...I must go practice.

Sunday

Enjoyed church this morning, and ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship) which we are Directors of and which is basically an adult Sunday school class. Been doing it for over 2 years now, and have to say I really am liking it. Definitely has its ups and downs...but our leadership team is fantastic and the whole experience is fulfilling, hopefully for those who attend it as much as for us.

My youngest son has recently been accepted to Eller School of Management at the University of Arizona. So proud of him and happy...took a while for him to get there, but now he has two years left of college and should be set to seek a satisfying and lucrative career post-graduation. He'll be WINNING!!! (sorry, couldn't resist)

My daughter seems to be MIA...no response to my text or my post on Facebook. Sometimes I wonder why she doesn't respond to me...am I an overbearing mother? Do I interfere (or seem to) too much? I really try not to, but how do I know if I'm being concerned or crossing over the line to being intrusive? Sigh. This mothering thing doesn't get any easier...so all you young moms who think once the kids get older and self-sufficient it will be a smooth ride, HA! Don't kid yourself. Mothers worry M-O-R-E when their kids are adults and we can't see the choices they are making...and they tell us what they want us to know or what they think we want to hear, and nothing more. Which is the way of things. I did the same with my mother, who by the way is now 94 years old. If she knew of just a small portion of what I did as a young adult (and older) she would likely be appropriately shocked. So, I don't tell her, but then again at this point she likely wouldn't remember it anyway!

Time to think about dinner...and spending time with the hubster. Who, by the way, is the best husband in the world (see above).

Well, Hello Again

It is now 2011...almost 2 years have passed since my last post. I have been re-inspired by one of my nieces to get back to my blog. I figure if she can blog while being a full-time mommy of 2 toddlers, I should be able to take another stab at it. I am, for all intents and purposes, retired, which means I don't have to chase children around all day, wiping noses, changing diapers, dealing with temper tantrums while attempting to challenge and amuse them, like my now-blogging niece does.

Reading my previous posts has been entertaining. Now I have to decide (or rather gather the courage) to make it known that I have a blog. Sometimes it is hard to reveal who I really am to those who may not know me very well...even (or rather, especially) family members. I hate to think I may be disliked or rejected because of my revelations of my deep thoughts and feelings...or mostly opinions. Opinions are all around us every day, in many ways. Sometimes jabbing at us...sometimes floating around...many times "in your face", and it can be hard to consider and/or accept someone's opinion when it differs so much from what we hold dear as our opinion. Emotions can run high when opinions show themselves...and I am so not confrontational that in many cases I would just as soon keep my opinion to myself in order to "keep the peace". That being said, as I have aged and learned who I am, I am finding I'm a little more daring when it comes to sharing my opinion...hence this blog. And it won't be all opinion, oh that would be awful. I will aim toward more reflecting and what I am experiencing in this life of mine.

I invite you to read on...this is me...well, not all of me, but a fairly good representation. I'll try not to be too serious about myself or my opinions...but I will also allow this to be the place where I can be free to just let it all hang out. And, comment if you want to...I would love to know what you think.

Now, let's see if I can write more in a day or two...